Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar – The man who knew cricketing infinity, icon, god and demi-god all rolled into one. I think it is time that you called it quits! Before you dismiss me as another one of your critics let me assure you that I am not your critic. I was a fan of yours once upon a time. Not anymore! It is high time that you retired and passed the cricketing baton to a younger generation.
Here are some questions that you need to honestly answer to yourself.
You say “I will continue to play as long as I enjoy my cricket”. Does not the statement sound extremely self-serving? You are more interested in you enjoying your cricket rather than the billions enjoying your cricket. Don’t you realize that many a youngster with a larger heart would enjoy cricket in the Indian team a lot more than you.
You say “It would be selfish of me to retire now when I am in the top of my form.” I have to admit that this statement of yours is an extremely clever form of self-deception. Isn’t it more selfish to deprive budding youngsters of a chance to play in the national team? Not many will agree with your assessment that you are now in top-form when it has taken you more than a year to score your 100th century.
You say”I know when to retire”. Do really believe you do? If you did you would have quit after India won the World Cup. The other more important issue is that few will have the courage to tell you to leave. After all you have more number of runs, 50’s and centuries than anybody else.
You say “I get goose bumps when I hear the national anthem while standing along with your team mates.” While it is nice to know that your patriotic sense still burns in you imagine what a youngster who is getting a first chance to play in the national team would feel in a similar situation. His heart would probably burst with pride.
In any case with your love for the game, with your patriotic desires the best thing you could give a lot back to cricket and to India. For e.g. you could start a cricketing academy and coach youngsters on the nuances of the game. You could write a book on the “sound batting technique”. You could give so much more away from the limelight than you being in the Indian team with its hectic schedules.
I sincerely hope that Sachin the gentleman prevails over Sachin the cricketer!
Monday, March 26, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Mind-maps
Dr. Daniel Siegel in his book mindsight talks about the need to have mindsight or an awareness of the activities of our mind. He suggests that we need to understand our SIFT and (Sensations, Images, Feelings and Thoughts) while encountering difficult emotions. One particular concept in his book is the concept of using maps in knowing ourselves, our dear ones or people at large.
In the book he discusses what he calls Me-map, You-map and Us-map. So what are these maps?
Me-map: Most of us are so wrapped in ourselves that we have what I would like to refer as I-map. We are the center of the universe. We are the nucleus behind all worldly activity. Our problems consume us completely. What is more important is that we have what is termed as Me-map. We need to understand ourselves. We need to be aware of our sensations, images, thoughts and feeling (SIFT) in each every encounter that we have. We have to understand ourselves.
You-map: Our daily lives are made of interactions with our spouses, our children, relatives and colleagues. But we usually run into rough weather in our relations. Why does this happen? This because with everybody we create a he-map or she-map. We look at them objectively. When our spouse or friends relate their problems or source of joy to us we mentally look at it objectively. What is really needed is that we create a You-map. We need to be able to view the problem or source of joy through their eyes and mind. We must be able to visualize what they are going through and what they are experiencing. For this we need to be good at creating You-maps
Us-maps: Very few in this world create Us-maps. When we hear of poverty or see pain we usually create a They-map. We must feel both empathy and sympathy for this. We need to create Us-maps. We must feel compassion for the suffering and pain of others. We must be able to visualize what the under-privileged are going through. We need to feel compassion (Do read Dr. Alex Lickerman’s post: What compassion is?). We need to create Us-maps.
Hence to improve the quality of our daily lives we need to become adept in creating Me-maps, You-maps and Us-maps.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Our bottom-up mind
Our mind works from the bottom up. In other words the sub-conscious mind with all its emotions drives our conscious mind.
In a day we human beings have close to 12000 thoughts. A large part of these thoughts are driven by our inner desires, our hatreds, our likes and dislikes. The conscious mind more often than not, is just verbalizing what we feel inside our deepest core. The conscious mind tries to explain or put words to our feelings.
For e.g. let us say that you resent some person. What happens is that the conscious mind comes up with ideas about all the negative aspect of the person you dislike. You will find that there are so many reasons why the person you hate is so despicable. The conscious mind will explain the inner hatred that you have. In the end you will start believing that the hatred is a consequence of all your observations rather than the other way around i.e. you had resented this person to start with.
On the other hand when we are infatuated with some body then our mind finds so many reasons to make this person virtuous. We find qualities in the person that probably don’t even exist. In many ways the unconscious mind triggers thoughts in our conscious surface.
While we may think that we are reasoning the world we see around us, in most case we just try to explain to ourselves what our emotions are telling us.
In fact in “How to know yourself”, Alex Lickerman, M.D. says that if we explore our mind we will discover things that are counter to our expectations. He goes on to say “The conscious mind, however, is a great explainer. It’s irresistibly drawn into making sense of the world and everything in it, including itself.”
In most cases it is more important to address our biases, our resentments or our anger. If we are caught in trying to argue with ourselves,verbally, then we will end up frustrated. We have to attack the underlying cause which is behind all our verbal layers that our conscious mind makes to root out the problem.
In a day we human beings have close to 12000 thoughts. A large part of these thoughts are driven by our inner desires, our hatreds, our likes and dislikes. The conscious mind more often than not, is just verbalizing what we feel inside our deepest core. The conscious mind tries to explain or put words to our feelings.
For e.g. let us say that you resent some person. What happens is that the conscious mind comes up with ideas about all the negative aspect of the person you dislike. You will find that there are so many reasons why the person you hate is so despicable. The conscious mind will explain the inner hatred that you have. In the end you will start believing that the hatred is a consequence of all your observations rather than the other way around i.e. you had resented this person to start with.
On the other hand when we are infatuated with some body then our mind finds so many reasons to make this person virtuous. We find qualities in the person that probably don’t even exist. In many ways the unconscious mind triggers thoughts in our conscious surface.
While we may think that we are reasoning the world we see around us, in most case we just try to explain to ourselves what our emotions are telling us.
In fact in “How to know yourself”, Alex Lickerman, M.D. says that if we explore our mind we will discover things that are counter to our expectations. He goes on to say “The conscious mind, however, is a great explainer. It’s irresistibly drawn into making sense of the world and everything in it, including itself.”
In most cases it is more important to address our biases, our resentments or our anger. If we are caught in trying to argue with ourselves,verbally, then we will end up frustrated. We have to attack the underlying cause which is behind all our verbal layers that our conscious mind makes to root out the problem.
Friday, March 9, 2012
Succeeding in life
Most of us want to be successful in life. We tend to focus on the word “success”. Success by itself denotes nothing more than an accomplishment at a particular point in time or a series of achievements in a narrow field. It is an event or a series of events in a specified field. When we think of successful people we may think of a Steve Jobs, a Michael Jackson, the Beatles or Mark Zuckerberg
All of the above have achieved success in life. Clearly they were veterans in their chosen field. But there is a difference between achieving “success in life” and “succeeding in life”.
If we want to achieve success in life then we have to put our whole heart and soul into the narrow domain we are interested and keep persevering in it. There is nothing wrong with this.
However if we do achieve success in it we may still feel unsatisfied. The issue is that while we are successful we have not succeeded in life.
In order to succeed in life we have to understand that we have to succeed in the journey of life. We have often heard the saying “Success is not a destination, it is journey”.
In this journey in life we have different spheres of activity namely our personal, our professional, our social and our spiritual. Achieving success in a narrow domain will not make us feel great except in a temporary sense.
To succeed we have to focus our attention in all aspects of life while trying to excel in any narrow domain of our choice – music, technology, creative writing or sports. How often we hear of famous people complaining that their lives feel empty. How many of the rich and famous join some cult or follow some spiritual guru.
While success in life indicates a personal victory, succeeding at life is much broader. To succeed in life we may face occasional setbacks, but in life as a whole we will be able to achieve what we intend to.
So to succeed in life we need to ensure that our personal and family life is in order. We have to make sure that we excel in our professional life. We need to constantly increase our circle of friends and finally we need to make spiritual progress on a continuous basis.
In this journey we have to keep at succeeding in life rather in just trying to attain temporary success.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Are we deceiving ourselves?
Are we deceiving ourselves? This was the question which I have been asking myself for the past couple of days. If for a moment we put away our ideas of soul, atman, karma and sin then what are we left with. We would just live each and every day in own merit.
So does karma or sin really make sense? A human being is nothing more than a slightly glorified version of an animal. We probably have a much more evolved sense of ourselves, have developed a language to communicate and would like to think that we have choice. As human beings we really pride ourselves with having the ability to be self-aware besides also having the freedom of choice.
This choice that we pride ourselves in is nothing more than a slightly evolved animal ability. I have seen a dog smell a piece of bread on occasions and quietly turn away. Is it not exercising choice then?
Then we delude ourselves into thinking that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. This is really only true to human beings who are conscious of their acts. There are many people in the world who simply rationalize their acts and sleep with an easy conscience for the rest of their lives.
When a lion slaughters a deer and eats it does it acquire bad karma? No. However if subsequently a hunter comes and shoots it down would the animal world deceive itself that it was the lion’s karma to get killed?
This brings us to the Greek ethical question that plagued the Greek philosophers’ many thousand years ago. “Is it better to be strong or is it better to be good?” They concluded it is better to be strong.
That is reality. In many ways we live in a world of “matsya nyaya” or might is right. However there are sensible people in the world who do good to others simply because they believe “in doing unto others what they would like have done unto them”.
What are your thoughts on this?
So does karma or sin really make sense? A human being is nothing more than a slightly glorified version of an animal. We probably have a much more evolved sense of ourselves, have developed a language to communicate and would like to think that we have choice. As human beings we really pride ourselves with having the ability to be self-aware besides also having the freedom of choice.
This choice that we pride ourselves in is nothing more than a slightly evolved animal ability. I have seen a dog smell a piece of bread on occasions and quietly turn away. Is it not exercising choice then?
Then we delude ourselves into thinking that every action has an equal and opposite reaction. This is really only true to human beings who are conscious of their acts. There are many people in the world who simply rationalize their acts and sleep with an easy conscience for the rest of their lives.
When a lion slaughters a deer and eats it does it acquire bad karma? No. However if subsequently a hunter comes and shoots it down would the animal world deceive itself that it was the lion’s karma to get killed?
This brings us to the Greek ethical question that plagued the Greek philosophers’ many thousand years ago. “Is it better to be strong or is it better to be good?” They concluded it is better to be strong.
That is reality. In many ways we live in a world of “matsya nyaya” or might is right. However there are sensible people in the world who do good to others simply because they believe “in doing unto others what they would like have done unto them”.
What are your thoughts on this?
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Say hello - To yourself!
If there is anybody we spend the most time with it is ourselves. We are with ourselves, right from the time that we are born. We know of others only through occasional interactions or hearsay. We are in reality not really familiar even with our parents, brothers or sisters.
Despite spending a life time with ourselves we are hardly aware of our inner selves.
That is because our mind forms an effective shield to who we really are. Out mind deceives us so very artfully that we are hardly aware of it. Our pure inner self is covered by layers of clever deception wrought by our mind.
Who we think we are and who we really are completely different. In our minds we are the smartest, the kindest and the most sincere human being on earth. We are the “knight in shining armor” in our mind’s eye.
On the other hand, our mind will quickly pounce on all the faults and foibles of our near and dear. Our mind will tend to zero in on the negative traits of people and will try to position ourselves in a better light.
We never pause for a moment and try to reflect on who we really are. We never try to peel the layers of deceit which are mind wraps our understanding with and warps our view of reality. That is the real problem!
If we stop by to dig deeper into our inclinations, into our interests, into our likes and dislikes we may come up with things about ourselves that may not be too palatable. We may realize that we are in reality quite selfish, quite conceited and really unkind.
We may come up with the awful realization that we are not really doing anything worthwhile with our lives.
So I would suggest that you take a deep breath and say a “hello” to yourself.
Start by looking into your inner core. Try to peel of the layers of deceit that your mind had created all through these years. Try to go beyond the constant chatter of petty resentment, beyond the nagging of your mind and try to understand who you really are.
We should clear the dust, dirt and grime from our minds. Only then we may be able to see the mirror of our pure selves at our inner core.
Despite spending a life time with ourselves we are hardly aware of our inner selves.
That is because our mind forms an effective shield to who we really are. Out mind deceives us so very artfully that we are hardly aware of it. Our pure inner self is covered by layers of clever deception wrought by our mind.
Who we think we are and who we really are completely different. In our minds we are the smartest, the kindest and the most sincere human being on earth. We are the “knight in shining armor” in our mind’s eye.
On the other hand, our mind will quickly pounce on all the faults and foibles of our near and dear. Our mind will tend to zero in on the negative traits of people and will try to position ourselves in a better light.
We never pause for a moment and try to reflect on who we really are. We never try to peel the layers of deceit which are mind wraps our understanding with and warps our view of reality. That is the real problem!
If we stop by to dig deeper into our inclinations, into our interests, into our likes and dislikes we may come up with things about ourselves that may not be too palatable. We may realize that we are in reality quite selfish, quite conceited and really unkind.
We may come up with the awful realization that we are not really doing anything worthwhile with our lives.
So I would suggest that you take a deep breath and say a “hello” to yourself.
Start by looking into your inner core. Try to peel of the layers of deceit that your mind had created all through these years. Try to go beyond the constant chatter of petty resentment, beyond the nagging of your mind and try to understand who you really are.
We should clear the dust, dirt and grime from our minds. Only then we may be able to see the mirror of our pure selves at our inner core.
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Manage your future …Now!
There are 3 types of people in this world. The first type generally drifts about in life. They go wherever life takes them. They have neither interest nor passion about anything. The second category of people are the highly stressed lot. They are usually tossed about from one crisis to another and they are highly strung and overwrought in life. The last category of people are those who have a purpose in life.
Life is all about having meaning and purpose. What is really important is that we sit down and take stock of our life. We have to actively manage our future and we have to do it now!
It is in our own self-interest that we take an active interest in how we manage our future and our life. To do this we have to ask these pointed questions to ourselves
Where am I now?
This is the first question you have to pose to yourself. Are you happy with life? Are you frustrated? Are you content? We have to look at our lives in all possible angles. Are we having a good family life? Are we spending quality time with our spouses, children, parents, brothers and sisters? Ask yourself, “Am I enjoying my job? Am I getting the salary I deserve or am I in the right place with the right designation? How is your standing in the social circle – you old school, college friend and you old colleagues. We have to ask these questions and we must try to answer them honestly.
The next question that we have to pose ourselves with is –
Where do I want to go?
Given a clear view of where you are currently where would you like to be in the next couple of years? We have to have a realistic view of what we want to do in life and what we want to achieve. Imagine your future. Are you looking for respect among peers, a larger social circle or a better position in a larger organization? Would you like to own a house, a car or send your child to study in a foreign university? While being realistic in your dreams make sure you sprinkle a lot of ambition. If you can dream it, you can surely achieve it.
And finally
What am I going to do about it…Now!
You have understood where you stand in life and you know where you want to go in your future. The next step is act. To put into motion things that will get you started on the path to achievement, to the path of your dreams and to your future. As they say “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”. Act now and act decisively. In management parlance it is all about “execution”. We must execute on the plans starting now to achieve what may seem impossible.
So, take control of your life and drive bravely to a brighter future.
Life is all about having meaning and purpose. What is really important is that we sit down and take stock of our life. We have to actively manage our future and we have to do it now!
It is in our own self-interest that we take an active interest in how we manage our future and our life. To do this we have to ask these pointed questions to ourselves
Where am I now?
This is the first question you have to pose to yourself. Are you happy with life? Are you frustrated? Are you content? We have to look at our lives in all possible angles. Are we having a good family life? Are we spending quality time with our spouses, children, parents, brothers and sisters? Ask yourself, “Am I enjoying my job? Am I getting the salary I deserve or am I in the right place with the right designation? How is your standing in the social circle – you old school, college friend and you old colleagues. We have to ask these questions and we must try to answer them honestly.
The next question that we have to pose ourselves with is –
Where do I want to go?
Given a clear view of where you are currently where would you like to be in the next couple of years? We have to have a realistic view of what we want to do in life and what we want to achieve. Imagine your future. Are you looking for respect among peers, a larger social circle or a better position in a larger organization? Would you like to own a house, a car or send your child to study in a foreign university? While being realistic in your dreams make sure you sprinkle a lot of ambition. If you can dream it, you can surely achieve it.
And finally
What am I going to do about it…Now!
You have understood where you stand in life and you know where you want to go in your future. The next step is act. To put into motion things that will get you started on the path to achievement, to the path of your dreams and to your future. As they say “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”. Act now and act decisively. In management parlance it is all about “execution”. We must execute on the plans starting now to achieve what may seem impossible.
So, take control of your life and drive bravely to a brighter future.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
The law of conservation of mental energy
Equilibrium, equipoise and equanimity – these are the key principles behind the “law of conservation of mental energy”. We have to maintain our equilibrium in the face of success or failure, victory or defeat, pain or pleasure. The Gita says “that a true yogi is beyond opposites, he is above duality”
This is no idle statement. The ability to maintain our equanimity in the face of failure is extremely important. When we depressed or when we get excited we expend a lot of mental energy. When our mind is under tremendous stress because of pain or when we are too excited overjoyed our mind looses its equilibrium and is in a state of unstable tension. Prolonged excitement or depression can really leave one enervated and exhausted.
Hence it is critical to be able to maintain our mental equilibrium under all conditions. This is extremely difficult to put into practice since we are conditioned and programmed to react with joy to success and feel depressed when hurt or when encountering failure.
We could maintain our poise by telling ourselves that the excitement or sadness will eventually pass. We can then try to view it slightly more dispassionately.
When we conserve our mental energies by maintaining our mental equilibrium we are left with more energy to focus on problems that we have. If we expend all our energies in being overjoyed or in feeling downcast we are bound to be exhausted and we will not have any energy left.
So the key principle in life is to maintain equipoise under all circumstances.
This is no idle statement. The ability to maintain our equanimity in the face of failure is extremely important. When we depressed or when we get excited we expend a lot of mental energy. When our mind is under tremendous stress because of pain or when we are too excited overjoyed our mind looses its equilibrium and is in a state of unstable tension. Prolonged excitement or depression can really leave one enervated and exhausted.
Hence it is critical to be able to maintain our mental equilibrium under all conditions. This is extremely difficult to put into practice since we are conditioned and programmed to react with joy to success and feel depressed when hurt or when encountering failure.
We could maintain our poise by telling ourselves that the excitement or sadness will eventually pass. We can then try to view it slightly more dispassionately.
When we conserve our mental energies by maintaining our mental equilibrium we are left with more energy to focus on problems that we have. If we expend all our energies in being overjoyed or in feeling downcast we are bound to be exhausted and we will not have any energy left.
So the key principle in life is to maintain equipoise under all circumstances.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Learn to unthink
Yes. We have to consciously learn to “unthink”. This may seem odd. After all what is “unthinking”. According to me “unthinking” is the need to stop a thought in its tracks and consciously think on another line contrary to our innate tendencies. Let give you an example. When someone insults you, our natural tendency is to get angry. Why? Because our egos have been hurt and we feel the strong urge to retaliate and give a piece of our mind to that somebody. We react this way because of our conditioning, because of years of programming handed down to us through the ages that insults have to be responded in equal measure with anger.
It here we need to pause and reflect. Can we instead of reacting with anger, extinguish immediately the surging fury in us and instead smile and act gracious towards our offender. This is what I mean that we have to unthink the insult. As Christ says, “love your enemy. Be kind to those you hate you”. In other words we have to go against the grain of our programmed and predictable behavior and respond with graciousness and magnanimity.
We have to consciously unthink in these cases. As humans we all crave for recognition and fear criticism. We want those words of praise for the acts that we do. We want recognition. We want respect. “I” have done this. “I” Have achieved this gets in the way. In these situations also we need to “unthink”.
We have to get rid of the “I am the doer” and “I am the change agent”. This is what the Gita tells us. We are not really the agents we believe we are. It is all in God’s plan. We just fit in the grand scheme of things and really we cannot take credit for the success or failure of what we do. In other words we have to learn to “unthink”
The ability to not just act according to our pre-dispositions, according to our programmed behavior is extremely difficult to do. In most cases we just behave in certain ways without even thinking just because our reasoning mind tells us do so.
But beyond the reasoning mind of us mere mortals are the great teaching of Jesus or Christ which requires to step back, unthink and then act.
It here we need to pause and reflect. Can we instead of reacting with anger, extinguish immediately the surging fury in us and instead smile and act gracious towards our offender. This is what I mean that we have to unthink the insult. As Christ says, “love your enemy. Be kind to those you hate you”. In other words we have to go against the grain of our programmed and predictable behavior and respond with graciousness and magnanimity.
We have to consciously unthink in these cases. As humans we all crave for recognition and fear criticism. We want those words of praise for the acts that we do. We want recognition. We want respect. “I” have done this. “I” Have achieved this gets in the way. In these situations also we need to “unthink”.
We have to get rid of the “I am the doer” and “I am the change agent”. This is what the Gita tells us. We are not really the agents we believe we are. It is all in God’s plan. We just fit in the grand scheme of things and really we cannot take credit for the success or failure of what we do. In other words we have to learn to “unthink”
The ability to not just act according to our pre-dispositions, according to our programmed behavior is extremely difficult to do. In most cases we just behave in certain ways without even thinking just because our reasoning mind tells us do so.
But beyond the reasoning mind of us mere mortals are the great teaching of Jesus or Christ which requires to step back, unthink and then act.
Friday, January 13, 2012
The purpose of life is constant renewal
As we progress through life we accumulate various unique experiences. From our individual experiences we form opinions, judgments and biases. From our biases we start to build our belief systems. Based on our belief system we start to act one way or the other.
For e.g. our belief system may result in our finding fault with our friend or our relative. We have our own set of beliefs of what is right and what is wrong. We think a person should have acted in some particular way. When we find them behaving in a different way then we begin to find fault with them. However the person so acting is doing so based on his/her belief on what on what the correct response should be.
Hence in this world all of us carry within ourselves our own individual belief systems which are usually the result of a lot of confusion and strife in this world.
Our primary purpose in life is to reflect deeply on own belief system and constantly try to refine our view of the world. Most of the time, many of us just carry on with our own ideas of how things should be. We rarely ever try to realign our belief systems. We just continue to stick to our views rigidly which we formed based on our experiences in this world.
Every now and then we need to take stock of our beliefs and our value system. One way to do this is to read the scriptures or to read or listen to the masters. We then will have to reflect on the true meaning behind the words. For e.g. the verse from the Gita “do your duty without any attachment and dedicate the fruits to God” can mean different things to different people. For some it can mean that one has to go to office and stomach all sorts of indignities heaped on one in official life. To a housewife it could mean “being a good mother and wife”. But the more we think about this we realize that there are a million different shades to the above statement. It could imply doing our duty as a son, father, husband, friend, colleague, worker, boss to being a good Samaritan a good citizen and so on. Similarly the biblical saying “if anyone smites thee on one check, show him the other” could again mean many things from quietly accepting ill-treatment, to changing another through magnanimity or to repay with love, acts of violence.
In any case, we need to reflect and refine our beliefs. This will take time. We should not persist in stagnating in our rigid views. We have to constantly refine our personal views of the world. This is imperative in life.
For e.g. our belief system may result in our finding fault with our friend or our relative. We have our own set of beliefs of what is right and what is wrong. We think a person should have acted in some particular way. When we find them behaving in a different way then we begin to find fault with them. However the person so acting is doing so based on his/her belief on what on what the correct response should be.
Hence in this world all of us carry within ourselves our own individual belief systems which are usually the result of a lot of confusion and strife in this world.
Our primary purpose in life is to reflect deeply on own belief system and constantly try to refine our view of the world. Most of the time, many of us just carry on with our own ideas of how things should be. We rarely ever try to realign our belief systems. We just continue to stick to our views rigidly which we formed based on our experiences in this world.
Every now and then we need to take stock of our beliefs and our value system. One way to do this is to read the scriptures or to read or listen to the masters. We then will have to reflect on the true meaning behind the words. For e.g. the verse from the Gita “do your duty without any attachment and dedicate the fruits to God” can mean different things to different people. For some it can mean that one has to go to office and stomach all sorts of indignities heaped on one in official life. To a housewife it could mean “being a good mother and wife”. But the more we think about this we realize that there are a million different shades to the above statement. It could imply doing our duty as a son, father, husband, friend, colleague, worker, boss to being a good Samaritan a good citizen and so on. Similarly the biblical saying “if anyone smites thee on one check, show him the other” could again mean many things from quietly accepting ill-treatment, to changing another through magnanimity or to repay with love, acts of violence.
In any case, we need to reflect and refine our beliefs. This will take time. We should not persist in stagnating in our rigid views. We have to constantly refine our personal views of the world. This is imperative in life.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Life's lessons from the Gita and the Bible
Here a list of key lessons from the Gita and the Bible. These are really difficult lessons to practice in daily life but well worth trying.
- Maintain your poise towards success or failure, pleasure or pain, sorrow or joy (A true yogi is one who has transcended the dualities – Gita)
- Maintain your equanimity at all times. Do not swayed by praise or criticism ( A true yogi is neither elated at praise nor is he upset by criticism – Gita). If we have this attitude we will not crave for recognition nor will fear criticism
- Treat everyone equally without bias or partiality (To a true yogi a brahmin, an outcast or a dog is one and the same – Gita). We should not form opinions or pass judgments on others.
- Repay with love when an act of unkindness (Love your enemy – Bible).
- Never harbor any hatred towards anybody at anytime (Forgive those who hurt you. Pray for those who persecute you – Bible). It never helps to nurse a grudge against anyone. A grudge is an unnecessary burden than be destroyed utterly only through forgiveness.
- Give and give freely. Do not trumpet your acts of charity (Your left hand should not know what your right hand is doing – Bible)
- Avoid finding fault with others or criticizing another (Judge not, lest ye be judged. Condemn not, lest ye be condemned – Bible)
- Perform all actions without any ulterior motive (Do your duty without any desire for the fruits of your actions – Gita)
These lessons from the Gita and the Bible are truly eternal in their concept. They are living lessons that will live till eternity
- Maintain your poise towards success or failure, pleasure or pain, sorrow or joy (A true yogi is one who has transcended the dualities – Gita)
- Maintain your equanimity at all times. Do not swayed by praise or criticism ( A true yogi is neither elated at praise nor is he upset by criticism – Gita). If we have this attitude we will not crave for recognition nor will fear criticism
- Treat everyone equally without bias or partiality (To a true yogi a brahmin, an outcast or a dog is one and the same – Gita). We should not form opinions or pass judgments on others.
- Repay with love when an act of unkindness (Love your enemy – Bible).
- Never harbor any hatred towards anybody at anytime (Forgive those who hurt you. Pray for those who persecute you – Bible). It never helps to nurse a grudge against anyone. A grudge is an unnecessary burden than be destroyed utterly only through forgiveness.
- Give and give freely. Do not trumpet your acts of charity (Your left hand should not know what your right hand is doing – Bible)
- Avoid finding fault with others or criticizing another (Judge not, lest ye be judged. Condemn not, lest ye be condemned – Bible)
- Perform all actions without any ulterior motive (Do your duty without any desire for the fruits of your actions – Gita)
These lessons from the Gita and the Bible are truly eternal in their concept. They are living lessons that will live till eternity
Sunday, January 8, 2012
The mind has its own reasons
“The mind has its own reasons” may come as a surprise. But this is very true. While we may consciously reason and want to react in a certain way, when a situation presents itself we react instantaneously based on our internal conditioning. In other words we behave according to the reasoning of our mind.
We may read profound philosophy, be able to articulate noble ideas and thoughts. But in our daily lives when someone attacks our ego we react with anger. All our spirituality and philosophy simply goes up in smoke. We may cool down as an afterthought.
What this indicates to us is that intellectual understanding of spirituality is one thing but adherence to it in real life is completely different. It is not enough that we understand spirituality. We have to internalize it through constant practice.
We have to be able to remove the deep programming that is within us. We have to peel layer by layer this conditioning of ours. It is not easy to react with kindness when somebody is mean to us. Generations of conditioning will make us spew venom in retaliation to meanness. Is there a way to remove this conditioning?
In my opinion, spirituality like any other discipline requires years of practice and a constant unswerving devotion to God. We must through practice internalize good values in our lives.
It is only then will be able to be unruffled by “criticism or praise” as the Gita requires us. It is only then will be able to “love our enemy” as suggested by Christ.
But to achieve such a state in life is no easy task and requires discipline, complete surrender to God and an in-depth understanding of our own mind. We must dispel all the cobwebs of evil in our mind and replace it with love and devotion to God.
Only then can we lead a truly virtuous life.
We may read profound philosophy, be able to articulate noble ideas and thoughts. But in our daily lives when someone attacks our ego we react with anger. All our spirituality and philosophy simply goes up in smoke. We may cool down as an afterthought.
What this indicates to us is that intellectual understanding of spirituality is one thing but adherence to it in real life is completely different. It is not enough that we understand spirituality. We have to internalize it through constant practice.
We have to be able to remove the deep programming that is within us. We have to peel layer by layer this conditioning of ours. It is not easy to react with kindness when somebody is mean to us. Generations of conditioning will make us spew venom in retaliation to meanness. Is there a way to remove this conditioning?
In my opinion, spirituality like any other discipline requires years of practice and a constant unswerving devotion to God. We must through practice internalize good values in our lives.
It is only then will be able to be unruffled by “criticism or praise” as the Gita requires us. It is only then will be able to “love our enemy” as suggested by Christ.
But to achieve such a state in life is no easy task and requires discipline, complete surrender to God and an in-depth understanding of our own mind. We must dispel all the cobwebs of evil in our mind and replace it with love and devotion to God.
Only then can we lead a truly virtuous life.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
The puzzle of life – The Hindu, Christian and Buddhist view
Life is a puzzle at best. Different religions and religious philosophies have different approaches to life and the way to handle it. While at one end of the spectrum all religions are the same, at the other end they are unique and look at life from a completely different angle. This post tries to look at 3 of major religions of the world and their approach to life and how to conduct ourselves
Buddhism:
Buddhism answers the essential question “What is life?” The root of all existence is human suffering. Buddha expounds that life is suffering, in his four noble truths. Buddhism further clarifies that suffering is born of attachment, cessation of suffering is attainable and the path to cessation is based on taking the middle path given in his eight-fold path.
Hinduism:
Hinduism essentially answers the question as to “how should one lead life?” According to Lord Krishna in the Gita, one should perform one’s duty with detachment and without any concern for the fruits of the action. We should perform all actions as a sacrifice to God in the full awareness that it is the Creator who is the doer of all actions. Further the Gita tells us that it is better to do what is intrinsic to one’s nature rather than just do something for another.
Christianisty:
The central message of Christianity is “how should one behave”. The bible requires us love one’s neighbor as one loves oneself. In fact, Jesus goes to the extent of requiring us to love where we would want to hate or in other words we are to “love our enemy”. The Bible also enjoins us to forgive those who err against us, pray for those who despise us. We are to lead a life of love, compassion and mercy.
While all the religions require us to conduct our lives with highest moral principles they essentially show a different path.
Buddhism:
Buddhism answers the essential question “What is life?” The root of all existence is human suffering. Buddha expounds that life is suffering, in his four noble truths. Buddhism further clarifies that suffering is born of attachment, cessation of suffering is attainable and the path to cessation is based on taking the middle path given in his eight-fold path.
Hinduism:
Hinduism essentially answers the question as to “how should one lead life?” According to Lord Krishna in the Gita, one should perform one’s duty with detachment and without any concern for the fruits of the action. We should perform all actions as a sacrifice to God in the full awareness that it is the Creator who is the doer of all actions. Further the Gita tells us that it is better to do what is intrinsic to one’s nature rather than just do something for another.
Christianisty:
The central message of Christianity is “how should one behave”. The bible requires us love one’s neighbor as one loves oneself. In fact, Jesus goes to the extent of requiring us to love where we would want to hate or in other words we are to “love our enemy”. The Bible also enjoins us to forgive those who err against us, pray for those who despise us. We are to lead a life of love, compassion and mercy.
While all the religions require us to conduct our lives with highest moral principles they essentially show a different path.
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
Parallel philosophies of Lord Krishna and Jesus Christ
There are many parallels in the philosophies of Lord Krishna as mentioned in the Bhagavad Gita and Jesus Christ in the Bible. This post highlights some of the parallels below
Christ: Judge not, lest ye be judged. Condemn not, lest ye be condemned.
Lord Krishna: Enlightened men are those who see the same in a Brahmana with learning, a cow, an elephant or a dog. In other words the yogi does not form opinions or judgments about others. A true yogi treats all persons with the same footing.
Christ: Love your enemy. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who treat you with disdain.
Lord Krishna: A true yogi is unaffected by praise or criticism. By always dwelling in the Atman he is unruffled by hatred, contempt or anger. According to the Gita, a true yogi is a person who is expansive in his heart. He has risen above the joy that comes from praise or the hurt that comes from bitter criticism
Christ: The kingdom of God cometh not with observation. For behold, the kingdom of the God is within you.
Lord Krishna: Above the senses, the mind, the intellect is the Atman which is within you. In the Upanishad’s this is also mentioned as “Tat tvam asi”, “Thou art that”. The Atman is inside you and we become aware of it through self-inquiry.
Christ: You cannot serve God and Mammon at the same. Here Mammon refers to the desire for wealth.
Lord Krishna: Perform niskama-karma or desireless action. Offer all the fruits of your action to God. Rise above desires and passion. Lord Krishna in the Gita enjoins us to rise above the rajasic nature of passion to a sattvic nature of principled living.
Though the words were different Lord Krishna and Jesus Christ were saying the same thing.
Christ: Judge not, lest ye be judged. Condemn not, lest ye be condemned.
Lord Krishna: Enlightened men are those who see the same in a Brahmana with learning, a cow, an elephant or a dog. In other words the yogi does not form opinions or judgments about others. A true yogi treats all persons with the same footing.
Christ: Love your enemy. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who treat you with disdain.
Lord Krishna: A true yogi is unaffected by praise or criticism. By always dwelling in the Atman he is unruffled by hatred, contempt or anger. According to the Gita, a true yogi is a person who is expansive in his heart. He has risen above the joy that comes from praise or the hurt that comes from bitter criticism
Christ: The kingdom of God cometh not with observation. For behold, the kingdom of the God is within you.
Lord Krishna: Above the senses, the mind, the intellect is the Atman which is within you. In the Upanishad’s this is also mentioned as “Tat tvam asi”, “Thou art that”. The Atman is inside you and we become aware of it through self-inquiry.
Christ: You cannot serve God and Mammon at the same. Here Mammon refers to the desire for wealth.
Lord Krishna: Perform niskama-karma or desireless action. Offer all the fruits of your action to God. Rise above desires and passion. Lord Krishna in the Gita enjoins us to rise above the rajasic nature of passion to a sattvic nature of principled living.
Though the words were different Lord Krishna and Jesus Christ were saying the same thing.
Monday, December 5, 2011
A yardstick for life!
Is there a yardstick with which we can measure our lives? In his extremely thought provoking and insightful article "How will you measure your life?" Clayton M. Christensen, the Harvard Business School professor provides this extremely useful yardstick. He says "Don’t worry about the level of individual prominence you have achieved; worry about the individuals you have helped become better people."
What an extraordinary statement to make? We, as individuals, tend to measure our success in life based on achievement of personal glory, power, personal wealth etc. But what is really required for happiness and enduring satisfaction in our lives is in what way we are able to make the lives of those around us just a little better. This is truly a noble endeavor.
It does not mean that that the only way we can influence others is through charity. While charity can help there are possible several other ways in which we can help others. For e.g we could use our learning to educate. We could provide moral support to those who lack in confidence. We could spend some time in making happy those who are terminally ill or have some debilitating disease. There are several ways that we can extend our help and care for those around us.
But typically what happens is that we lead very self-centered lives. We are in a race to make the most money, grab a chuck of power, look to garner personal glory. We live a life that is self-centered all the time.
We may achieve success by way of fame,power and wealth but in the long run it may not give you as much a glow of satisfaction as helping others lead better lives.
We need to shift the focus of our lives from ourselves to those around us. That way we will lead a far more fulfilling life!
What an extraordinary statement to make? We, as individuals, tend to measure our success in life based on achievement of personal glory, power, personal wealth etc. But what is really required for happiness and enduring satisfaction in our lives is in what way we are able to make the lives of those around us just a little better. This is truly a noble endeavor.
It does not mean that that the only way we can influence others is through charity. While charity can help there are possible several other ways in which we can help others. For e.g we could use our learning to educate. We could provide moral support to those who lack in confidence. We could spend some time in making happy those who are terminally ill or have some debilitating disease. There are several ways that we can extend our help and care for those around us.
But typically what happens is that we lead very self-centered lives. We are in a race to make the most money, grab a chuck of power, look to garner personal glory. We live a life that is self-centered all the time.
We may achieve success by way of fame,power and wealth but in the long run it may not give you as much a glow of satisfaction as helping others lead better lives.
We need to shift the focus of our lives from ourselves to those around us. That way we will lead a far more fulfilling life!
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Sermon on the Mount - Truly sublime
Jesus Christ’s Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5:3- 5:48) and (Luke 6:20 – 6:49) is truly sublime in its grandeur. The sermon is awe inspiring and truly majestic in its depth, breadth and philosophical import. The sermon is based on the two fundamental pillars of love and mercy. Christ says that harboring anger against anyone as condemnable as murder itself. One does not need to commit an act to transgress righteous behavior. Evil thoughts by themselves are themselves heinous. Hence hatred, lust, contempt or jealousy is bad in itself. In fact Christ goes on to say “Judge not, lest ye be judged!” We have no right to criticize, pass judgments or opinions about others when we are less than perfect ourselves. There is no point criticizing about the “mote” in another’s eye when you have “beam” in your own eye.
The central point of Christ’s teachings is the need to repay with kindness any act of hatred towards you. This is contrary to the tit-for-tat and the eye for an eye we generally tend to react. For he says “for whosoever smites thy right cheek, turn to him the other also” and give, give freely to anybody who asks anything of you. With regard to charity Christ says “thy left hand should not know what thy right hand is doing”. There is no need to trumpet about one’s generosity and one’s kindness. This is similar to the Gita’s teaching which requires us to involve ourselves in charity without any regard to the expectations or fruits whatsoever.
Where the sermon truly sweeps you off your feet is where Christ asks to instead of loving our neighbor and hating our enemy to “Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, pray for those who despise and persecute you”. This is truly contrary to mankind’s years and years of conditioning where we react with animosity towards people we hate. We react with anger to insults and contempt. Christ asks to repay with love and kindness all acts of enmity and hatred.
With regard to forgiveness and mercy Christ’s response to Peter who asks him “how many times should I forgive my brother if he sins against me. Seven times?” To this Jesus says “Seventy times seven”. This is clearly a figure of speech and the crux is that we have to forgive and show mercy always and as many times as needed, simply because “so likewise shall my heavenly father do also unto you”. As human beings we err many times in our lives and God forgives us always.
What is really inspiring about the Sermon on the Mount is its all encompassing love and forgiveness that it preaches. Rather than behaving with anger and hatred towards people we hate, as we are programmed to react, we are encouraged to show mercy and behave with love and compassion. It really brings forth our human side of nature. The Sermon on the Mount is truly awe inspiring.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
The lost art of listening
Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish in their parenting bible “How to talk so kids will listen and how to listen so kids will talk” provide excellent ideas in dealing with children. This book is a must for parents, would be parents and almost anybody interested in understanding the nuances of human nature.
In the book the authors come with the following situation:
Situation 1 (as per book) : Your boss asks you to complete a certain task. But because you are busy doing other things you miss the task completely and are the target for your boss’s outburst the next day.
Situation 2 (mine): Imagine it is you come home tired from office. Now assume that your spouse is interested in going out to a party and you are too tired to respond. You can expect your spouse to turn ballistic.
Situation 3 (mine): You are expecting a promotion in office and are on tenterhooks. But you come to realize that you have been passed over and your colleague who is a few years junior to you gets the promotion. You are completely deflated.
You are bound to be hurting in all the above 3 situations. Let us say that you relate this to a friend of yours. You are bound to get one of the following responses, according to the authors
The advice: This response is probably the one you will least interested in. The responses could be “You should have done your boss’s work first” or “You have to make sacrifices for your spouse” or in the 3rd situation “You did not work hard enough”
The philosophical response: This response could be “We are destined to enjoy or suffer. It is our karma”
The barrage of questions response: In this type of response you could face a volley of questions “Why did you ignore the boss’s request” or “did you not know that you had to go out with your spouse”. It could be “Did you make sure your boss knew your achievements etc.”
The empathic response: The listener may be sighing and say that he feels very sorry for your plight and he wished he/she could change your situation.
However, in most cases, you would not be interested in listening to criticism or even constructive suggestions. Most often what we want when we are hurting is a patient ear. Somebody who just listens to us in silence, probably with a faint acknowledgement accompanied by the nodding of the head. The solutions and advice can come later. We just want the pain to subside before we are ready to listen to anything.
In most cases when somebody pours their troubles to you, watch the signals carefully and respond appropriately. It is not necessary to give advice, be philosophical or even empathic. Just acknowledge the suffering by listening to them completely.
Let us resurrect “the lost art of listening.”
In the book the authors come with the following situation:
Situation 1 (as per book) : Your boss asks you to complete a certain task. But because you are busy doing other things you miss the task completely and are the target for your boss’s outburst the next day.
Situation 2 (mine): Imagine it is you come home tired from office. Now assume that your spouse is interested in going out to a party and you are too tired to respond. You can expect your spouse to turn ballistic.
Situation 3 (mine): You are expecting a promotion in office and are on tenterhooks. But you come to realize that you have been passed over and your colleague who is a few years junior to you gets the promotion. You are completely deflated.
You are bound to be hurting in all the above 3 situations. Let us say that you relate this to a friend of yours. You are bound to get one of the following responses, according to the authors
The advice: This response is probably the one you will least interested in. The responses could be “You should have done your boss’s work first” or “You have to make sacrifices for your spouse” or in the 3rd situation “You did not work hard enough”
The philosophical response: This response could be “We are destined to enjoy or suffer. It is our karma”
The barrage of questions response: In this type of response you could face a volley of questions “Why did you ignore the boss’s request” or “did you not know that you had to go out with your spouse”. It could be “Did you make sure your boss knew your achievements etc.”
The empathic response: The listener may be sighing and say that he feels very sorry for your plight and he wished he/she could change your situation.
However, in most cases, you would not be interested in listening to criticism or even constructive suggestions. Most often what we want when we are hurting is a patient ear. Somebody who just listens to us in silence, probably with a faint acknowledgement accompanied by the nodding of the head. The solutions and advice can come later. We just want the pain to subside before we are ready to listen to anything.
In most cases when somebody pours their troubles to you, watch the signals carefully and respond appropriately. It is not necessary to give advice, be philosophical or even empathic. Just acknowledge the suffering by listening to them completely.
Let us resurrect “the lost art of listening.”
Monday, October 24, 2011
The experience and the experiencer
Anger, envy, jealousy, pride or hatred – these are all negative emotions that bind us completely. Whenever these emotions hit us we are left reeling under the impact till much later. We are completely ensnared by its viciousness. Sometimes we get a little wiser as an afterthought, if we are vigilant. Otherwise we just wallow in the cruel tidal waves of the emotions.
The key thing to understand here is that when we are held in sway by these negative emotions is that there is “the experience” and there is “the experiencer”. More often than not we are not able to separate ourselves from the experience as it completely controls us and we do not have access to conscious reasoning. Whenever we are angry, jealous, proud or just egoistic we just are so completely full of it that we don’t realize that we are under the grip of an emotional storm.
What is important is to be able to detach ourselves from the onslaught of this mental maelstrom. We need to be able to look at “the experience” as being separate from us, “the experiencer”. When we are angry, we should be able to pause and tell ourselves “I feel anger” or when we feel proud we should be able to reflect on the feeling as “I am feeling proud”. This simple reframing of the situation can work wonders. Here we see ourselves the “I” as being different from the emotion “anger” or “pride”. We are able to distance ourselves from the fury of anger and look at it as an observer. Similarly when we feel proud or arrogant, we need to able to look at the pride as an observer.
This is an extremely difficult thing to do. Since, we have absolutely no control when the emotions of anger, hatred, jealousy or pride take over us. It takes a lot of practice to be able to see the experience as different from the experiencer i.e. ourselves. We need to be able to tell our minds “Get off, of me”. This requires a lot of insight into ourselves and enormous soul searching on our part.
But if we are able to successfully view the experience as being different from the experience we are bound to have attained a greater degree of control over our lives.
The key thing to understand here is that when we are held in sway by these negative emotions is that there is “the experience” and there is “the experiencer”. More often than not we are not able to separate ourselves from the experience as it completely controls us and we do not have access to conscious reasoning. Whenever we are angry, jealous, proud or just egoistic we just are so completely full of it that we don’t realize that we are under the grip of an emotional storm.
What is important is to be able to detach ourselves from the onslaught of this mental maelstrom. We need to be able to look at “the experience” as being separate from us, “the experiencer”. When we are angry, we should be able to pause and tell ourselves “I feel anger” or when we feel proud we should be able to reflect on the feeling as “I am feeling proud”. This simple reframing of the situation can work wonders. Here we see ourselves the “I” as being different from the emotion “anger” or “pride”. We are able to distance ourselves from the fury of anger and look at it as an observer. Similarly when we feel proud or arrogant, we need to able to look at the pride as an observer.
This is an extremely difficult thing to do. Since, we have absolutely no control when the emotions of anger, hatred, jealousy or pride take over us. It takes a lot of practice to be able to see the experience as different from the experiencer i.e. ourselves. We need to be able to tell our minds “Get off, of me”. This requires a lot of insight into ourselves and enormous soul searching on our part.
But if we are able to successfully view the experience as being different from the experience we are bound to have attained a greater degree of control over our lives.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Free will or fate? Fate it is.
Do we have free will? Or are all our actions pre-determined? In other words are we inextricably bound by fate, kismet or vidhi? I am sure most people would probably say that a human being has the ability to choose their actions in any situation.
When I was young I was told by my parents that our lives were pre-determined. That it was one’s vidhi or fate to suffer or enjoy in life. This could be because of one’s karma they said. As I grew older I realized that man has the ability to make a choice. As a conscious being we have the ability to choose one of several possible alternatives.
While this argument may sound plausible at a surface, when one probe deeper we find that we really do not have free will. Our current state in life is dependent on our past actions. The actions that we choose to take, at any point in life, are dependent in a large part on our past experiences. The choice we may take is dependent on our past reasons, our past conditioning, our current biases and current opinions. The actions that we take in the present are definitely determined by our conditioning in life.
Given the fact that our actions can only be based on our past experiences, does it make sense to think that our actions are independent of any past conditioning? The answer is an emphatic, No!
Clearly this indicates that our actions are determined by our past conditioning. Then where is the question of free will?
Free will pre-supposes that our actions in the present cannot be determined in any way and is in many ways, truly random. But this is clearly not true. In any given situation, our choice will depend on our past experience and we will act in the most optimum way. Our choice will depend on whether there is personal gain. For e.g. when we are insulted, we do feel hurt. That is true for most of us. May be a few enlightened souls, may choose to be detached from the insult. But a majority of human beings will behave in extremely predictable ways in any given situation. The only difference in behavior will only arise based on the slightly different experiences that different people have.
Otherwise our actions are truly predictable and will be based on past conditioning. We will chose to maximize our gains in any given situation and make the most rational choice.
Given this does it make sense to think that man has free will? Clearly not! The world and our lives are deterministic and we are all bound in fate.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Navigating the narrow path
When we are young - good and bad are usually in black and white. However as we grow older we realize that life and values in life are not so straight forward. There are many shades of grey that exist between the good on one side and evil on the other. Oftentimes we have to contend not with just the good and bad but with the good and the good.
We are forced to confront a hierarchy of values of life namely kindness, compassion, honesty, patience, tolerance and humility. How does one decide between two virtues in a situation? We are forced to wrestle between different virtues in a situation. This post looks at typical situations and tries to take a stab at navigating the narrow path between good, better and best…
Honesty is good, Tact is better: While honesty and stating facts as facts makes sense when one is young as we grow older we need to take a smarter approach towards handling different situations. Very often people feel offended when they are told the truth, particularly when they are wrong. They may feel insulted. In these situations we need to be more subtle in telling the truth. We need tact and tell the truth in a more palatable way. So honesty should include a good amount of tact and smarts.
Kindness is good, Indulgence is not: We all know that we have to be kind. So while our innate kindness may want us to part with a few coins to a beggar, it would it make no sense to constant shower the same beggar with a lot of money, assuming that the beggar is not physically handicapped and can earn an honest living. Similarly while we may want to be kind to our child we should not condone the child’s tantrums. Kindness and discipline go hand in hand. Kindness should be accompanied with dollops of good sense.
Humility is good, Servility is bad: Humility is a very misunderstood concept. We generally think humility is the opposite of pride. We think that humility means that we should try to underplay any achievements of ours. We assume incorrectly, that we must never, ever talk about things that we have done. Actually humility means being able to fully understand one’s strengths and weaknesses and having a realistic view vis-à-vis the world. We must realize that while we may be good there are many who are still better. So humility is being realistic about one’s achievements. However, we often confuse humility to being very servile. We think that to be humble means to just listen to everything and everybody. This is completely incorrect. So we need to humble but we should never be servile.
Self-esteem is important, Egoism is bad: Self esteem is extremely important. We need to take pride in our achievements. It is fine to highlight our achievements to others provided we are not arrogant. We should never compromise on our self-esteem. We should never be too egoistic in our own self. Excessive pride can sometimes border on narcissism. We need to have a balanced approach towards our achievements. Our successes should feed out self-pride but never make us excessively proud and arrogant.
While this post looks at different shades of a particular virtue the highest of all virtues is kindness and compassion. It is always more important to be kind than correct.
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